Teachable Moment

“Children have never been very good at listening to their elders, but they have never failed to imitate them.”  ~ James Baldwin 

 

Life provides a multitude of teachable moments, both for ourselves and for those children we parent and/or mentor.  And of these moments, there are many that deal with handling different types of adversity.  Some of the toughest of these are trying to provide perspective to our children about those situations where adults who are supposed to be role models are acting -- well, like children.

 

Such a moment occurred this week when adults, who were organizing a horse show that attracts many children and teenagers,  decided to not allow certain children to attend because of a perceived disagreement with other adults.  The children, understandably disappointed, received a first hand example of how some adults can regress into childish pettiness.  This sad situation, however, turned into a  teachable moment, showing the children that regardless of how others act, those actions cannot take away from oneself and that one can rise above the actions of others. These momentary disappointments pave the way to far greater opportunities.

 

Out of this sad episode, came a shining opportunity to teach the next generation an early lesson in resilience and the grace that comes out of adversity. These wonderful kids, lesson learned, are happily preparing for their next show, where they will truly shine.

 

 

Selflessness

“Non nobis solum nati sumus.
(We are not born for ourselves alone.)”

~ Marcus Tullius Cicero On Duties 

 

One of the biggest things that owning an animal does for a us is to teach us selflessness.  Animals require constant care: feeding, bathing, grooming, exercising.  They get sick and need to be nursed back to health.  Animals require the gift of our time and our ability to observe and respond to their unspoken needs to ensure that they thrive and have a quality life.  In return for caring for our animals, we receive their loyal companionship and their unconditional love.  Horses are no exception and require a considerable investment of time.  For such a beautiful and majestic creature, they are surprisingly fragile.  For me, though, caring for River is a labor of love.

 

Growing up with animals as part of the family teaches children about selflessness.  Feeding and caring for a creature that relies solely on a human for its basic necessities is a powerful lesson in responsibility and of the gift of self that translates to how a child learns to relate to others in our human society.  And one is never too old to experience the powerful life lessons of caring for an animal.

As part of the larger world, as Cicero said so many centuries ago, we are not born to be an island unto ourselves.  We are meant to be active, engaged, and selfless members of a larger society. As we give to others (animals, strangers, co-workers, friends, family members), we also indirectly give right back to ourselves.  In fact, helping others has shown direct benefits to the giver's health!

So, today practice a little selflessness.  In helping others you will be helping yourself and making the world a better place -- one selfless act at a time.

 

Reflections on the Year Gone By....

"Christmas is a season not only of rejoicing but of reflection." ~ Winston Churchill

 

As we are in the Christmas Season and the end of year and with the new year just around the corner, it is a time of joyful anticipation.  It is also a time, as Winston Churchill noted, of reflection -- reflection over the year that has gone by and reflection on the year that is fast approaching.

 

As I look back over the past year, it has been a maelstrom of events -- some of great sadness and loss but others of great joy.  I have witnessed humanity at its most base and selfish, balanced by the true grace of humanity at its most generous and giving.  I have learned much and grown much.

 

River, too, has had her ups and downs.  Another bout of laminitis and a diagnosis of Cushing's Disease were setbacks, but with the care of a tremendous community of horse professionals, River is thriving and once again we are now riding together.  River continues to teach me in so many ways.  She continually helps me expand my capacity for patience, as she continues to expand my learning on horses and horse care.  Through her, I have met and developed friendships with a wonderful community of people that have reignited my passion and opened my horizons to new things.

 

As we end 2014, I think of how far we've come and how exciting the journey in 2015 will be.

 

Wishing each of you, a very happy and health journey in 2015!

 

Maynette and River

 

 

The Season's Magic....

"Christmas waves a magic wand over this world, and behold, everything is softer and more beautiful." ~Norman Vincent Peale

Last night was the Christmas Party at the barn where I board River.  Even though it is Florida, the air was crisp and chilly, making the horses very energetic.  Christmas lights were hung everywhere.  There was good food, good friends, and the sounds of Christmas music.  I brought River up from the pasture to her stall.  She enjoyed everyone coming by and making over her.  As I walked back up to the barn in the dark after putting River back out in her pasture, I paused.  Standing on the path, I had a great view of all the Christmas lights.  I could hear the laughter,  the music, and the nearby sounds of the horses.  Looking up, it was a clear night with all the stars visible.  It was truly magical. Standing there, the beauty of the world truly filled me with awe and gratitude.  While the moment passed, the feeling has lingered.  I am going to strive to hold on to that feeling now and into the new year.

To you and yours, Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, and Happy Holidays from River and me.  Wishing you magical moments!

Simple Gifts

'Tis the gift to be simple, 'tis the gift to be free

                   'Tis the gift to come down where we ought to be,

And when we find ourselves in the place just right,

                  'Twill be in the valley of love and delight.

When true simplicity is gained,

                    To bow and to bend we shan't be ashamed,

To turn, turn will be our delight,        

Till by turning, turning we come 'round right

~ "Simple Gifts" by Joseph Brackett

I have always loved the song, "Simple Gifts", an old Shaker hymn.  It is profound in its very simplicity. 

It seems especially appropriate as we enter into the Holiday Season with stores clamoring for our attention with great deals for gifts and the attendant pressure to buy the perfect gift for that special someone to remember that the "simple gifts" are  the best ones of all.

So, what are some great simple gifts?  Here are a few ideas to get you started:

- Volunteer at an animal shelter.  Shelter animals need love and attention -- and many times a person to help them regain their trust in humans.

- Teach others a special talent or skill you have (e.g. woodworking, crafts, amateur radio).  Sharing your time and passion inspires passion in others.

- Tutor a student.  You can change their academic future.

- Clean out your closet. Take those unworn clothes and unused toys and give them to your favorite charity's thrift shop or to a local women's shelter. It will make a world of different to those in need.

- Take meals to those that cannot leave their homes.  It will make a bright spot in your day and in theirs.

 Let's start the "Simple Gifts" movement. Add to the list and pass it on!

 

River -- one of the many special things I am thankful for.

                                        

Walk in my Shoe...

They say that to understand a person you need to walk a mile in their shoes.  For the past week, I have had just a taste of how those with physical limitations live their lives.  I have cracked a bone spur in my foot and am walking around in a "boot", facing the distinct possibility of foot surgery.  (And no, River, my equine coach, had no part in my foot issue!) While I am pretty mobile in this "boot", I have to give considerations into walking distance and weather (can't get the darn thing wet), not to mention the general navigating around with it. 

What has been a real eye opener is how people act in large stores when you have physical limitations.  In several trips to a local store, I have been almost run over as people rush around me or past me.  There is no consideration that they might hit by bum foot or knock me over.  I am a physical barrier to get past -- and mind you, I can walk pretty fast in this contraption!

This makes me think about others that have greater physical limitations than I -- and mine is just temporary.  They are surely facing many of the same issues in public places, and on a larger scale. If you are able bodied, you don't give a second thought about maneuvering in a parking lot or in a store around people and things.  To someone that has physical limitations, one has to be strategic with every outing taking into account so many things others take for granted:  Can I walk on my crutches from here to there?  Do I have enough room to translate from my car to my wheelchair?  Can my walker fit in that tight space?  Can I lift that jug of detergent while trying to stand with a cane?

On top of that, there are some whose physical limitations may not be apparent to the general bystander.  My Dad, for example, had kidney failure.  Due to that, he was limited in how far he could walk and had a handicapped sticker for his car.  Physical limitations don't necessarily mean that someone is walking with crutches or a cane.

I am not lamenting my condition, nor am I viewing those with physical limitations with pity.  I am, however, looking at how to be more considerate of others who brave and conquer the able-bodied world everyday.  Take a second to imagine all of those things you take for granted as an able-bodied person.  Now, look at others with new eyes.  Don't treat someone as an impediment to get around.  Enjoy the journey and those travelling with you -- even those of us who may be travelling in the slower lane. 

Body, Mind, and Soul

"Health is a complete harmony of the mind, body, and spirit.  When one is free from physical disabilities and mental distractions, the gates of the soul open." ~ B.K.S. Iyengar

As River has some chronic health issues, keeping her healthy through proactive means is critical to keep the recurrence of her health issues at bay.  This involves ensuring she eats the proper diet, drinks enough water, has regular farrier and vet appointments, and gets exercise. It also requires a lot of observation on my part, since River can't tell me if she doesn't feel well.

Proactively managing one's own health is crucial not only to operating at peak performance physically, but emotionally and spiritually as well.  A lot of what I do for River, I need to be doing for me as well:  making healthier food choices, drinking lots of water, getting enough sleep and exercising.  River helps with the latter.  The care of a horse involves a lot of physical activity, but I have to be responsible for the former items -- easier said than done!

When the body is not feeling good, it is hard to be on your game mentally, much less in touch with the spiritual.  It is when the body is healthy and the mind is engaged that the larger universe and all the wonder it entails becomes truly visible to us, as B.K.S. Iyengar reminds us.

With the hectic pace of our lives, it is often hard to focus on our own health; but tending to our own physical, mental, and spiritual health makes us more available to do more things -- for ourselves and for others.  Tending to our health enhances the quality of our lives in multiple dimensions.

Today, I am committing to making healthier choices to benefit me, my family, my friends -- and my trusted equine coach, River.   How about you?