Telepathy

One thing I found out early on after returning to my love of horses was the link between my emotions and the behavior of my horse.  Horses are keenly aware of your emotions -- almost like telepathy.  As an "older" rider, I am more fearful of falling off and getting hurt than I was in my tween and teens.  I don't bounce like I used too! And if a horse sees that his human leader is fearful, the horse figures there must be something to be fearful about and starts to become fearful as well.  Which starts an upward spiraling cycle, unless the human can get a hold of their emotions.  It takes time and effort for a person to develop the confidence to learn to constructively manage their anxiety and fear, but once done, it pays phenomenal dividends in the relationship with your horse.

This exercise in learning to deal with my fear and anxiety with respect to riding horses has paid dividends in my work and personal lives as well.  By learning how to constructively manage my fears (whether it be fear of confrontation or fear of the unknown), I can more constructively deal with difficult situations.

Not to say that I am totally there yet.  I am constantly being challenged by new experiences with my horse that cause my fear and anxiety to rear their ugly heads.  Case in point just happened yesterday.  My instructor had a clinic on ground training, focusing on how to properly lunge your horse.  My horse is not particularly thrilled with being lunged, and that was exacerbated by the fact I hadn't had an opportunity to exercise her in a while.  After my instructor demonstrated the proper lunging technique, I stepped in to lunge my horse.  My horse refused to lunge!  Every time I tried to get in the proper position to get her started, she pivoted to face me.  She pinned her ears and showed her extreme displeasure.  We kept up this dance for a short while.  My horse was not happy and I was alternating between being frustrated as nervous as I was trying to stay in the proper position by her shoulder if she decided to kick out.  So the more frustrated and nervous I got, the more she acted up.  She was testing me and I was failing as the "alpha" or leader.  Of course my instructor stepped in and showed me what I needed to do, but it is going to take me a lot of practice with my horse to develop the technique and the confidence to meet this next challenge -- just like one needs to practice and develop the confidence with each new challenge in your life.

The author lunging her horse.